Mid-year blues

June 30, 2010 § Leave a comment

Back. My last post was exactly 30 days ago and a lot has happened since then.
I’ve been happy, sad, lazy, productive but oftentimes I’ve been blank. Can’t seem to focus on anything.
Thus, the lack of blog posts ^_^

So this is my mid-year post. Just gonna talk about things that have happened and my thoughts and feelings about them. I’ll start with the most recent one since I’m having a hard time recalling those that happened earlier this year. LOL.

I met up with two people whom I had no plans of meeting up. This would probably be the only time I’d say anything about them. I’ve decided a long time ago that they belong to the past and feeling anything about them would be useless. Now why am I taking the time to write about it. Maybe for closure. I don’t know. But I feel that I just have to. Not so much as to convince other people (who probably won’t believe it anyway) but just to talk about it.

Last Saturday, June 26 was a busy day. Didn’t plan to go with them but when they called, I thought ‘WTH, why not?’. Never mind that I was dead tired, I went out to the noraebang and sang songs I wasn’t really feeling and drank beer. I didn’t mind the innuendos and the “pahirit” people said but I did have some thoughts about them when I got home.

I was singing Katy Perry’s “Thinking of You” and someone implied that the song reflects what I’m feeling. Damn. Can’t I sing songs just for the heck of singing it? Does it always have to mean that I’m singing it for someone and telling them whatever through the song?

True. I had feelings for the guy some time ago. But that was 2 years ago. 2 long years. I’ve dated 3 guys since then and frankly, he does not measure up to any of these guys. I could honestly say that I’ve completely lost any feeling towards him.

To be clear, I did not get angry and that was okay. But sometimes, people just have to let the past go and forget it. That wasn’t the only instance. At work last Monday, another person (who had feelings for the same guy too 0_0) teased me about the met up. People, let it go. ^_^

I hope I don’t sound so stern or angry or whatever. Imagine me saying all this in a nonchalant way. ^_^ It’s just how I feel really.

On a positive note, I’m glad we saw each other. I hope they realized and felt that I’ve gotten past the horrible feelings and I’m not bearing any grudges towards them. It’s sad though that the reality is, we will never be close again as we once were. It’s better that way.

I wish them all the best from the bottom of my (not broken; it’s a pun, I tell you) heart.

Okay. Done with the first “event”. LOL. I’ll write more tomorrow. Much love to all.


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